Divided

Divided between what I want and what i should do. I should stop thinking about you and saying things without knowing the situation your going through. But still I want to be part of that journey everybody calls life. Blaming only myself for being such a stupid coward as to not say anything when I had the chance. I keep dreaming of what could have been, and just waiting to see if I get another chance to say those things. The saddest thing is that I keep waiting even to see if you left even one word in this stupid thing, but for me even one word is worth waiting.

voces

Fucking voices inside my head won´t let me sleep in peace, waking me up in the middle of the night for no good reason. Still i try to erase them from my mind, to forget them and sleep in peace. Someone help me to rest!!

life

Going crazy because of this fucking duality, can´t be myself infront of my "friends" and family because they wouldn´t understan me. Hoping that time goes faster for all of those dull moments that i spend alone. I cant belive that i have fucked up so many times that i´m in this situation, because of what other people want or wanted in the past, why can´t they let me make my own choices and my own mistakes? Let me live my own fucking live so that if i do or don´t do something is in my head the remorse of that choice, and not live thinking "what could have happend if i did that?" because somebody else made that decision for me. LET ME LIVE MY LIFE!!!!

FUCK

i don´t know how to get away from all this shit that goes on inside my head, people talking about dissapointment, how i let them down, that i don´t do anything all day long and that i should be more responsible on the thing i do. i only have two words for all of those people that like to talk about other people and don´t look at themselfs, those two words are "FUCK OFF", leave people to make their own mistakes. if they do something wrong or they get bad grades its on them and they don´t need anyone to remind them of that. FUCK all the people that are not happy just living their own life that they have to mess with other people´s lifes. don´t know how many will read this but for those who do plaese let me know if you feel the same way.